My Debt, Actual Numbers… WOW.

Hello!  Happy Labor Day!

The morning, it is quiet.  My kid is out playing golf and I decided to do a post with some actual numbers.  I don’t think I’ve ever shared what I’m actually getting discharged.

Pulling out the paperwork and looking at these numbers is not something I take pleasure in doing.  I kind of filled them out, signed them and gave all the info to the attorneys that they needed.  Once all was said and done, I put them in a cabinet and play by the rules each month to hopefully get to a successful completion.

I need to take a look at these numbers because I think it’s a boost for me, give me a positive perspective and also share a bit more with you what my financial landscape looked like back in October 2012  when I filed.

This is the debt that I filed Chapter 13 on almost two years ago, next month.

Condo Second:        53,465
Condo Heloc              8,318
CC                               4,253
CC                               6,799
CC                               9,341
CC                              1,815
CC                              4,933
CC                                 331
CC                                   73
$89,328   almost $90,000! 

I don’t make that in a year!!!!!  Not even close!

$89.328!  I look at that number now it looks crazy insane to me.  I know how it happened.  You can read about it on my about page.

I’ve learned so much in the last two years.  Once this is over, I know for a FACT that I will NEVER let that happen again.  I can use the word NEVER here with certainty.  This is a huge learning experience for me and now that I see what I was up against I know that I made the right decision.

I will get into trouble if I don’t get an emergency fund in place.  I have got to get busy!  That is more certain now that ever.

I broke it down ever further.  I take the total and divide it into 5 years, I am paying off $17,865 a year. 

If  you consider the loan of $53,465 at interest of 8%, that would never have gotten paid back. Every month I kept paying and the amount never went down.  I was so upside down in my condo it wasn’t funny.

Finally I made the decision to file.   What is very sad is that back in 2009 I came so close to filing and then decided to keep trying to fix it myself.  By 2012 I realized I could not fix it myself.  Had I filed back in 2009 I would be done by now and my life would be set.  It would have been perfect timing for which I kick myself in the butt!

OMG, I remember the nights I would try to figure out snowballs and debt repayment on my own.  I  was addicted to all of the financial gurus and I tried it all only to fail and realize that there is no way on my own could I dig myself out. It was horrible stress.  Actually more horrible stress than being in a Chapter 13.  There was no end in sight.

This is a solution, there is an end.  It might not be soon, but there is an end.

I look at it this way.  I’m paying back approx $17,865 per year, so far that is $35,731 and there is no way I could ever have done that on my own.  That would have been $1488 per month if I tried to pay it back on my own.  More actually because there would have been interest.  I know my numbers are really rough!  ;-)  I am not paying nearly that much.  I can’t because there would be nothing left!

I need to keep that in mind.

Oh and as far as the Chase and Heloc?  I would never have been able to pay those off and now, at the end of this BK, they will be stripped.  GONE!  More about lien stripping here and this condo (for what its worth) will be mine without any liens on it.  That would never have happened.  That is the main reason I chose a BK 13 over a 7.

13s are so much harder than 7s.  You have to pay back some of the debt.  In a 7 you can just wipe it out and move on.  Heaven!  But you cannot strip liens in a 7 and to me, that was the biggest debt I had.

Its been tuff, but I have to keep my eye on the prize.  By the time I’m done, I will be 57 years old and my financial landscape will be where it should be.

I have a renewed ambition to get back on track.  I can’t wait for Cabo now.  That purchase was a huge mistake but that Vacation will be the last BIG one for us for the duration.  I  will use it as a rejuvenation time to come back with a renewed strength to get through the next 3 years to a successful discharge.

So there are my numbers.  I remember the lawyers told me that if you can’t come up with a plan to get yourself out of debt in 5 years (Sixty Payments) then you need to really consider a BK.  That is why it is there, for people to get back to good!

What a way to start the Labor Day huh?   A labor of love, to you and to me.


DebtGirl (for three more years)!


Long Weekend…


I hope this labor day weekend finds you well, happy and with fun plans!

No plans for me.  I’m staying close to home putzing around and just relaxing.  Its okay to do that, sometimes its REALLY OKAY to do that!


Have a great weekend whatever you have planned.

Be Safe!






If I was going to tag this post, (I probably won’t because I am really bad about blog housekeeping) I would tag it under Chapter 13 Stress.

Lots going on and I need to get it off my chest.  It does help to blog vent…. temporarily.

Let me list the things that are coming up that cost money and cause me stress, and lots of it.

  • The HOA board is discussing a Special Assessment for some structural damage on the buildings.  Oh… let see, up to 10K a piece/owner.  OMG…. This is my biggest stress!  I hate being on the board, my voice does not matter and just hearing all the drama might not be such a good idea after all.  I thought maybe I should be aware of these things.  However, if you can’t do anything about them, then what is the point?  Thoughts?
  • Car maintenance, I need tune up, probably brakes as well and all 4 tires are bad. Really bad.
  • My kid is going to want/need a car in the next couple of years.  I have nothing saved, nothing.  We all know how much a car costs plus the cost of getting Driver Ed, Insurance, maint…..
  • My kids golf is costing a fortune.  Right now she is concentrating on High School golf and I’m not paying any tourney fees/dues until November.  I do still take her to the clinics on Saturday when I can.  But in November I need to come up with membership dues and cost of the next tourney.
  • I have that trip to Cabo coming up and I really haven’t been able to save much for that. The flights and room are paid for.  But we have no money to do anything while we are there!  OMG, that was the stupidest thing I have ever done…. recently that is.
  • My couch is falling apart.  The cats have used it for a scratch post and its over 10 years old.
    Classy. Stinky.  Classy. Stinky…
  • The gasket on my refrigerator ripped, so I used duct take repair it. Classier.  I can buy a new gasket and replace it and plan to look into that in the next couple of months.  I already learned how to do it on YouTube. But really, I have never seen a ripped gasket before.
  • I just bought a ton of school clothes for my kid and paid over $300.00 for all her school registration stuff, but I think I missed the traveling fee for her sport AND now they have new golf uniforms as well, I have no idea how much that is gonna cost.
  • I want to take an art class in January.  Probably can’t afford it.  I really want to take that class.
  • My kids wisdom teeth are coming in.   That surgery to remove them is not covered on insurance.  I need to get those looked at before FSA sign up at work so I know how much to deduct.
  • Christmas is coming.
  • Taxes are coming.

It’s a wonder I can sleep at night.  Its no wonder that wine has become a staple at my house.  Its no wonder I have gained a few pounds and increased the wrinkle count on my face.  Its not wonder I lose my temper and am constantly distracted and scattered.

I honestly think that getting into this Chapter 13 was probably not the best Idea.  I am coming up on 2 years.  I still have 3 years to go and it’s a freaking nightmare each and every month.  Its crawling by.  There is no end in sight.  Do you think once I hit the half way mark I will feel like I am on the other side of the grade?  On the downhill slide?

OMG…I don’t wish this on anybody.  Have I been whining a lot, sorry!!  ;-)

Heavy sigh… and gulp, this glass of Pinot  tastes divine!

See you tomorrow!  Happy Friday!~



If Not Now, When?


Remember yesterday I told you I would bring up the subject of aging?   Maybe its because my mother is 93 and failing, that always makes us begin to wonder about our own lives when we see that in our parents doesn’t it?

Maybe its because I have been very confused lately about well… just about everything!  I’m confused about my job, my finances, my parenting skills, you name it, I am confused.  I always second guess myself and don’t feel at all secure with some of my decisions. 

I’ve been wondering about my mental state (that sounds funny) like why I’m confused and why I’m also losing all my self confidence.  I use to be the most confident person.  If you put a project in front of me, I would chomp at the bit for the challenge.  PS, I’m over menopause, so I can’t blame that!

However, I’m being challenged at work and what I really feel like doing is hiding, going under the radar and just staying status quo.  That FREAKS me out more than the project because… it’s not me.  I hate status quo, I need challenge and I have always risen to it.  So where is my confidence now when I need it the most?  What happened to it?

So I started looking up aging and self esteem/confidence on the internet.  I discovered it is a normal fact of aging.  We lose it.  Wow!  That too?  Not only do we lose our looks, health and energy, but we lose the ability to even act as if it doesn’t matter, that we can still be of value in  many other ways.  God am I a product of our environment or what? Sad.

After I glanced thru a few articles and websites.    I downloaded some freebie books on my iPad to read when I have time.  Oh, and that is another thing… Time!  There just doesn’t seem to be enough of it!  Or maybe I mismanage that too because of my confusion!  Winking smile

There are many ways to gain back self confidence, I won’t list them here.  You can Google and find loads of info if you too are lacking in that precious commodity!

I decided for me, I just need to commit 100% to the job at hand and just dig in and learn and do as much as I can!  Do my best as I always have.  I have to remind myself that there has never been an IT project that I couldn’t do… eventually.

Also, I want/need to do something just for me.  I think that will include taking some art classes at the community college if I can… 1) find the money and 2) find the time!  So in the fall I’ll look at that.  But if I can do something just for me that I have always wanted to do,  I think I will gain a sense of accomplishment and pride.  That will flex my confidence muscle!

Then I found this for a buck at the Friends of the Library. 


I cannot put it down.


It’s a good book, with lots of great stories of other woman facing the same feelings as I have.


Most are married, some are single and never been married, some widowed.


But we are all in the same stage of life, ranging from 40 to 55!  (Does that mean I am just plain old when I turn 56, in just two years?) Great!


It’s not brand new, but is really worth the read.  If you are in the mids then this book is a quick read and you will come to realize that you are not alone. 

This book talks about how some of us have a gaping hole in this stage of life,it also states that most of us are pretty confident.  So something happened to me that I don’t fit that mold completely.  Maybe it was the BK!!!

I plan to continue my search for self esteem and confidence.  I had it once, I can have it again.  Watch out when I find it!

Oh, here is a link to the authors site.


Happy reading.



Fancy! Um… Not

Hi Guys!  Hope you are having a great weekend.

I’m having a good weekend.  I walked all three days in a row, and I’m back on track with Weightwatchers.  I am not going to the meetings but I’m tracking food and four days in  row, I’ve been doing very well.  Hope to get back to my fighting weight very soon!  Its so easy to get off track once you get there, its like your brain tells its okay to eat whatever, but its not!  As you age, you have to really watch it.  More on aging later!  Ugh…

My mom is doing well as are her kitties.  Thanks for all the nice comments~  She is acclimating.  She’s not pleased with some aspects, but who can be when you completely lose all of the comforts of home?  I’m surprised she’s doing as well as she is.

Yesterday my I took my kid to her golf clinic and then on the way back I stopped at a thrift store.  I don’t have a travel purse and I don’t want to take one of these!  So I thought I would try to find a cross body at a thrift place because that is just the kind of thing you usually find there, and boy did I!

I got PRADA!!!



Its small and perfect.  Just enough room for money, hotel key and chap stick for when we are in Cabo!


I spent a whopping $8.00 on this Prada!

I also bought a couple of Tees for $3.00 a piece.  Just couldn’t pass these up!


Fancy huh?  Well, as things usually go for me the Universe needed to remind me that FANCY does not last long in my world…. I came home and the handle on the toilet broke!


How fancy is that?  Busted.


I looked it up on You Tube and realized how easy it is.  So then I bought a $2.99 handle and there you go:


All done.  Back in the day I would have panicked and called a plumber who would have charged me $100.00.

Not these days.  I have to figure out how to make things work with a very tight BK budget.

I’m So Fancy!  ;-)

More on aging tomorrow!  Maybe you will relate!



Mom’s Fur Babies

Today is moving day.  My mom is getting moved by my brother.  My sisters have been packing and going through my mom’s things since I left on Saturday.  Before I left, mom gave me these cute little kitties!

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Aren’t they cute?   I will keep them forever.

I told you I would share pics of her babies.  Lets start with the last one that she got.  This is Little Kitty:

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He came to live with my mom from somewhere in the complex.  He just showed up and strangely enough, her other two cats let him in.  So she found out where he came from and they gave him to her.  He needed so much love and she gave it to him.

]august 2014 199

Sweet boy:  When I stayed there he slept with me!

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Love Little Kitty!

This one is Pumpkin:

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More like a cream cycle!

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He has the prettiest face and my mom spoiled him rotten. 

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Now you have to meet Puddy Cat!

august 2014 163

My moms “perfect cat”.

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She loves this cat even though he needs to take a shot a day, bites her if she doesn’t get up on time, lays on her like she’s his cot and other various minor abuses!

She is keeping this special boy with her because she feels like nobody will love him like she does and he is “perfect” in her eyes!  “He looks just like a cat is supposed to look.”

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So there are my mom’s fur babies.  Pumpkin and Little Kitty are in their new homes with my sisters and they are doing well.

Mom and Puddy Cat are moving today and hopefully will be all settled soon!



Springwater Corridor–Portland Oregon

(Janelle, don’t miss this post!) Winking smile

One of the pics I posted the other day was taken on this path.  You have to check this out if you are in Portland!

springwater-ride-wts-2007-small1  (The Springwater trail 40 mile loop is a hard surface path about twelve feet wide)

Its an old train track and they turned it into a bike / walk path.  Its HUGE!

Carol's Springwater half century

I cannot wait to move back to Portland and make this part of my walk routine!  I have no idea where I will live, but this is pretty big and shouldn’t be too hard to live near!portland-bike-springwater

So next time you are in Portland or if you live there (lucky) check this out!

Ok, so I just need to post (vent) that I can’t even imagine this world without my mom in it.  I am 54 and she has always been THE ONLY person that really knows me, gets me and still loves me.  I know that going into the assisted living is the best because I know her meds will be given correctly and on time and she will be monitored, but I know what the inevitable is.

That is not BK related, but it is really part of my emotional life! I told you I would post about the ups and downs.   Its making it even harder to feel good about where I am.  The Cabo trip is weighing heavy on me like a huge boulder mistake right now. There is no way out of it.  I  just hope that I can try to enjoy it.

What a dumb ass I can be! ;-(

Sorry to vent!